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Old 05-29-2009, 01:09 PM   #1
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The iPhone is Life Affirming

Let me just say I am a womens and male mixed martial arts champion thanks to the iPee application in my iPhone.

It's difficult to make it in the male dominated world of fighting. Considering I used to be a man who couldn't make even the slightest dent in MMA I decided to get a sex change, now with my square jaw, 145 pound frame and long hair I hope to break into the women's MMA world.

Well I was intimidated beyond belief and consistently lost each fight I was in. I was told I fight like a sissy. Perhaps it was penis envy? So I needed a healthy dose of man juice.

My dwarf trainer gave me an iPhone with the iPee application installed. He told me to put photos of my enemies faces on there and urinate upon them. When I did this I felt a rush of power I have never felt before.

I instantly cried. I never cry. My dad was struck blind-deaf and stupid after an automobile accident that left him paralyzed, didn't cry when he died.
My mom was taken from me when she went out for a pack of smokes in Bronx, didn't cry then either. But the application's sheer awesomeness gets you to bow down and cry.

I put photo after photo of the women I would fight into the application. I became so empowered I have actually reversed my sex change operation and am once again male with a massive, throbbing member. Unfortuntly I am still a homosexual but I am a great fighter now.

-Forest
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Old 05-30-2009, 09:19 AM   #2
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Ummm, what?
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Old 06-03-2009, 12:36 PM   #3
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True story

True story, happened.
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Old 06-10-2009, 03:50 PM   #4
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Wow, that was an elaborate and odd promotion of an application :D
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